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Kay Rajwansh

flanœr

🌈ਬਾਰੀ🌈

ਬੂਹੇ ਜਦ ਬੰਦ ਹੋ ਗਏ ਸਨ ਸਾਰੇ

ਇਕ ਬਾਰੀ ਚੋ ਚਾਨਣ ਆਉਂਦਾ ਜਾਪਦਾ ਸੀ

ਕੈਦ ਸਾ ਇਕ ਹਨੇਰੇ ਕਮਰੇ ਚ

ਚਾਬੀ ਬੰਦ ਕਰ ਤੁਰ ਗਏ ਸਨ ਸਾਰੇ

ਮੈਨੂੰ ਮੈਂ ਇਸ ਜਹਾਨ ਦਾ ਨਹੀਂ ਸਾ ਲੱਗਦਾ

ਬੂੰਦ ਤੇਲ ਦੀ ਵਾਂਗ ਪਾਣੀ ਰੂਪੀ ਲੋਕਾਂ ਚ ਰਲ ਨਹੀਂ ਸਾ ਸਕਿਆ

ਸ਼ਾਇਦ ਇਸੇ ਕਰਕੇ ਬੰਦ ਕਰ ਗਏ ਸਨ ਚਾਨਣ ਹੀਣ ਕਮਰੇ ਚ

ਮੈਂ ਉਹਨਾਂ ਦੀ ਬੋਲੀ ਨਹੀਂ ਸਾ ਬੋਲਦਾ

ਮੇਰੇ ਕਹੇ ਅੱਖਰ ਜੁੜ ਕੇ ਉਹਨਾਂ ਦੇ ਸਮਝ ਆਉਣ ਵਾਲਾ ਮਤਲਬ ਨਹੀਂ ਸਨ ਬਣਾਉਂਦੇ

ਕੀ ਤੁਸੀਂ ਸਮਝ ਸਕਦੇ ਹੋ

ਅਗਰ ਹਾਂ, ਤੇ ਫਿਰ ਤੁਸੀਂ ਵੀ ਸ਼ਾਇਦ ਮੇਰੇ ਜਹਾਨ ਦੇ ਹੋ

ਪਰ ਕੈਦ ਹੋ ਸਮੇਂ ਦਿਆਂ ਦੀਵਾਰਾਂ ਚ

ਜਿਹਨਾ ਨੂੰ ਲਫ਼ਜ਼ਾਂ ਦੀ ਕ੍ਰਾਂਤੀ ਨਹੀ ਤੋੜ ਸਕਦੀ

ਪਰ ਬਾਰੀ ਚੋਂ ਆਉਂਦਾ ਚਾਨਣ ਉਹ ਉਮੀਦ ਹੈ

ਜਿਸ ਨੂੰ ਸਮਝਣਾ ਹਜੇ ਬਾਕੀ ਹੈ।

I wish not! 🌈

Someone told me to visit that dark alley.


They said it carries all the colours you are seeking.


It is believed that on a bright fine day it engulfed the rainbow which was shining in the sky after rain.


Since then that seven colour band is trapped there.


But to set the sail for the voyage to that alley one has to turn into mist.


Sitting on the corner of my balcony I pondered, “why can’t we break away and vaporise if we are nothing but matter?”


An unknown voice from a colourless hollow tunnel in the sky told me,
“You ain’t possess the energy to let loose the atoms of your body.”


I questioned if I could ever seize back that seven coloured arc gulped by that black alley.


But no answer was received.


Till this very moment I wonder why can’t I break free these forces of attraction holding my body together.


Can’t I conquer it and become one with the air; dissolved and anonymous.


Then I would penetrate the mind of those people through the holes in their ears and the pores of their body.


I’ll live in them for a day or two and study the intricacies of their minds in depth.


Will they feel my presence while I’ll play the game of unwiring, wiring and rewiring in their dull brain?


I wish not!


The voice came again from the sky and revealed a secret.


It told me that’s the reason you ain’t espoused with that energy.


Because you’ll swirl through minds; and read the unread, say the unsaid mysteries of the human psyche.


Simplifying the complexities of human brain.

Be at one with the mist

Gone

There he was creeping out from the reach of my hand.

I do not know when it all started, I never got a little hint.

He was changing, but like a chameleon he kept me in delusion.

I never knew my love was gone,

I never knew he was charmed not by me.

I wonder if love is permanent.

I wonder why people deceive.

I wonder why they hop from one to another.

I wonder why I could never do the same.

I wonder if I have a strong moral guard.

I wonder if morality is need of the hour.

So many things I wonder so many thoughts I bear.

We all will end up living under the same sky.

I know!!

But holding different hands.

Kissing different lips.

Fucking different bodies.

But loving someone we never knew.

Feelings are fragile.

Does love really die?

Do feelings change?

Can we change the object of our desire from one to another?

Can we barter the countless days and nights of one love with the happiness and charm of the other?

We change each day, each hour, minute and second.

But sometimes we change the time.

Memories will fade, love will hide into the deepest corner of the heart.

Because it knows the world has fallen apart and center cannot hold it anymore.

♥️ Journey ♥️

Can you see darkness in light?
You wake up at dawn
But eyes covered with the black night.
Is it dark or the absence of light?
I was walking on a road,
It was called the road to heaven.
But aren’t heaven and hell constructs of mind?
So what was I walking on?
Was I walking on road or was I walking in mind?
Mind and road; road and mind…
Roadmaps, Mindmaps…
I lost all!!!
Now I am walking through space,
There ain’t any destination it will lead me to…
There are no maps for space.
I’m floating; waiting for a meteor…

❤ Doubt ❤

I could be the best!
Could I be?
Doubtful, we all are…
Some distrust their capabilities and some their disabilities…

Doubt is common…
It prevails!

The girl was thrashed;
By every tom, dick and harry,
sitting on those broken benches in
class where the ceiling is damp, and
By all those people who claimed
that she had flawed political views
and lack an intellect to think in the valid direction.

The story didn’t end there…
Her self doubt took over all her believes about herself
When she saw her residing in his sympathies.
She ran into self questioning…
Can I be successful like her
carrying on with my insignificant profession?
Can I be beautiful like her
with my asymmetrical sense organs and disfigured body?
All these questions blackened her vision and blanked her psyche.

But in the corner of her shrunken heart
a sound came to sooth her beating pulse.
“Princess, no one’s better than you”, she heard her grandmother.

 

 

❤ आवाज़हीन ❤

Silence and silence
In the air between us
Still it ain’t vacuum
There is something; but nothing.

Is nothing something?
Or is it just no thing?
The air can carry sound.
It is contagious,
What; the sound or the air?

May be both.
But they are useless
They can’t put their feature in action
Silence and silence prevail.

Words cannot be conveyed
Though the medium of propagation is present.
But thought is absent
So are the words.
Without thought you won’t have matter
Without matter the air is useless
The sounds are unheard
Because they ain’t produced.

I told you to think
Now we are empty.
Silence and silence prevail.
But silence can also be heard
It is a sound of nothing.
Nothing is something…
Nothing vocalises silence
And therefore silence speaks.
But there ain’t any thought
But still the impact is deep.
If it can have a depth deeper than thought, then let
Silence and silence prevail.

❤The Mice❤

Don’t look at me through lifeless eyes.

They are injected with millions of “untold lies”.

There was some light beneath my skin.

I lost all my “radiation” in illuminating your life.

I could have saved some for myself, no?

My skin is dark now, lightless.

My eyes are black like that of a mice, who has just came out from your sewer pipeline.

That mice is staring at you.

It has a long black tail and a dark history of his life in those smelly filthy pipes.

The mice is awake when everyone’s  sleeping.

So am I!

I told you one morning, remember?

But that morning my eyes were glowing.

May be I had some light left under my skin back then.

But now I am BLACK.

Like the rat from the sewer, I told you.

He fall while climbing a wire, with a thud on the floor.

I woke up with that sound, with my black round eyes staring at him.

And his round black eyes looking at me.

May be he found a “kindred spirit”.

May I be understood something.

May be we all are rats.

And I am not lucky enough to find my poisonous piece of cheese yet.

❤ Not Sorry For Not Being a LADY ❤

I know this ain’t fair enough.
I am darker than you!

You are red,
But I have pale wheatish complexion.

You have those white symmetric teeth,
But my teeth jump on and off each other.

You have that Roman nose of a gentleman,
But I don’t have a nose sharp and small like a lady.

Your skin radiates like the rays of sun reflected from the crystal clear surface of sea,
But I have small red mountains bumping all over on my dull face.

You have a heavy and strongly toned voice,
But I can’t speak in the stately tone of a lady.

Because I have never wanted to be one.
And I am not sorry for that!

❤ Damned Me ❤

I have seen lovers turning into strangers with a blink of eyes.
They fall for same trap again and again.
Dead end…

Why to inflict pain on poor soul?
Dead end…

I regret bringing tears in your eyes.
Dead end…

No, you lie. You love my eyes that way. My cornea shielded by the curtain of water fallen out from those micro pores.
Blurred vision…

I see a stranger!

Can’t look into those eyes.
Why?
They lie the promises.

I can’t trust what they say through those occasional glimpses and ceaseless stares.
But I am a prisoner of fate.

I have fallen for their pretentious charm. Again!
They lied!
Now what do I have?
Dead end…

No, Damned me!

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